11.05.2006
TOP 10 SAD BASTARDS WHO MAKE SAD BASTARD MUSIC
BREAK OUT THE TISSUE PAPER AND PUT AWAY ANY SHARP OBJECTS IN THE VICINITY! KRISTINE LIM WRITES ABOUT THE SONGWRITERS -- AND THE SONGS -- THAT MAKE US WANT TO CRY
by Kristine Lim
It's only natural for me to begin this article with a mention of the film High Fidelity. Not only does its protagonist Rob—played by John Cusack—have an obsession with making lists (such as this one), the film also marks the first time I ever heard the term "sad bastard music." It was uttered by Jack Black's obnoxious record store clerk Barry, as a derisive retort to Rob's dismissal of his mix tape. Well, thanks to Barry, the term Sad Bastard Music (SBM) has been adopted by the indie-loving community to epitomize rainy day listening.
Like all musical classifications, Sad Bastard Music is a poorly defined blob, including and excluding on the basis of personal taste. On this note, I'm going to exclude Sad Bastard Hall of Famers like Robert Smith of The Cure, and Morrissey. It goes without saying that listening to either of them will cause you to wear eyeliner unironically and stay in bed all day causing your mother to worry about you. While SBM isn't confined to depressed moods, it's the perfect soundtrack for days when wallowing and staring out the window are on your to-do list.
On my list of Sad Bastards who make Sad Bastard Music are men who epitomize that quiet desperation we all experience, putting heartbreak to music so well that you'd have to be a complete asshat not to be moved in some way. I've included my choice of their saddest of sad bastard songs for your perusal.
10.
Jeff Buckley and "Last Goodbye"—I admit I'm not a great Jeff Buckley fan and I suspect it's because he's too sad. I like the occasional mope but listening to Buckley reduces me to tears. The first time I heard "Last Goodbye," I was on my way to school and just as it got to that part where he sings,
"Did you say/ No, this can't happen to me?" tears started rolling down my cheeks. I quickly wiped them away as I entered the gates, feeling foolish for feeling so much. But that's what his music does to you and that voice of his that soars and undulates was his unmistakable trademark.
9.
Josh Rouse and “Sad Eyes”—Mr. Rouse is a sad bastard by nature. Although he lives in sunny Spain and his current album
Subtitulo is filled with bossa nova influences and rich orchestral sounds, he can't escape his past as a man trapped in Middle America. Rouse is a master of quiet stories of trapped housewives and suppressive small-town life. "Sad Eyes" begins slowly, with Rouse, in his reedy voice, singing to someone,
"You are the only one whose blue skies are grey/ So don't cry/ You'll be the only one to make them go away." It ascends into a triumphant end, with violins crashing in the background and Rouse making promises he can't keep. (Runner-up: “My Love Has Gone,” also from
Nashville)
8.
Lou Barlow and “Skull”—Considered a pioneer of the lo-fi sound that emerged in the early 1990's, Barlow is a prolific songwriter, having been in bands like Dinosaur Jr., Sebadoh and The Folk Implosion. Sealing his fate as a sad bastard is this rumor that his girlfriend-at-the-time left him for a lawyer, so he wrote an entire album about it. He was able to woo her back, and eventually marry her. So happy endings all around! "Skull" might not sound like a pleasant song title, but it's one of Sebadoh's loveliest tunes. And who doesn't like songs about dragons and pot?
7.
Ben Gibbard and “I Will Follow You Into The Dark”—Gibbard has carved a niche in the 21st century as The Sad Bastard for the O.C. Crowd. His sweetly lilting voice, absolute sincerity, and lyrics like
"If there's no one beside you/ When your soul embarks/ Then I'll follow you into the dark" makes this song the ultimate lighter-in-the-air singalong. Of course the fact that the entire album
Plans is about death just makes it so much more...sad. Gibbard may seem like such a sweetheart, but within those big blue eyes of his lies a true bastard. A closer look into songs like "Tiny Vessels" and "Someday You Will Be Loved" show even sensitive dude Gibbard has a sinister side.
6.
Damien Rice and “Cheers Darlin'”—The Irish are born sad bastards. Maybe it's the weather, or maybe it's the Guinness. Either way Damien Rice has sad bastardry down pat. His 2003 album
O was full of personal anecdotes of his exploits as a traveling troubadour. "Cheers Darlin'" has got to be made the anthem of getting turned down in bars everywhere. He sings
"Cheers darlin'/ Here's to you and your lover man/ Cheers darlin'," with all the spite and regret a newly dumped man can muster.
5.
Nick Drake and “Northern Sky”—Drake is experiencing a revival 32 years after his death. Earlier this year, BBC aired a radio documentary on his life and work, and films like "Garden State" and "Serendipity" have used his music to up the romance factor. Indeed, "Northern Sky" was the perfect music for John Cusack (again!) and Kate Beckinsale to fall in love to. Although if they only knew of Drake's life-long sadness, as evidenced by lyrics like
"Would you love me for my money/ Would you love me for my head/ Would you love me through the winter/ Would you love me 'til I'm dead," they might have reconsidered their concept of fate.
4.
Ryan Adams and “When the Stars Go Blue”/”Come Pick Me Up”—I couldn't pick just one Ryan Adams song because these two share a special place in my heart. It's the same place I've reserved for the smell of old books and the thought of marrying David Duchovny. (Before I go any further though, I must warn everybody that if you come across a version of "When the Stars Go Blue" by the Corrs and Bono, I insist that you turn off your radio/ computer/ mp3 player. Your ears will never forgive you if you don’t.) Both songs begin quietly and end quietly as well. While "Stars…" is more reflective, focusing on the emptiness of city life, "Come Pick Me Up" is for all those people who love someone who treats them like shit. Yeah, you know who you are. Adams begs,
"I wish you would/ Come pick me up/ Take me out/ Fuck me up/ Steal my records/ Screw all my friends behind my back/ With a smile on your face/ And then do it again".
3.
Jeff Tweedy of Wilco and “Jesus Etc.”—"Jesus Etc." is in my Top 10 Songs of All Time. That's quite a bold statement since songs fall in and out of favor as quickly as one changes underwear. But I stand by my decision. Whether it's played live or you hear the album version, the effect of that slide guitar and violins is devastating. Tweedy's chain-smoking drawl sings
"Don't cry/ You can rely on me honey/ You can come by anytime you want." I swear, that croak of his is perfect for making tears flow. If you need further proof of their heart-break skills, I suggest you check out Wilco's cover of Big Star's "Thirteen". If that doesn't make you shed a little tear, then you're a heartless bitch.
2.
Rivers Cuomo of Weezer and “Across the Sea”—Rivers Cuomo is my boyfriend. I was that 18 year old girl who lived across the sea. Never mind that I wasn't 18, nor was I from a small city in Japan. Never mind that I never wrote him a letter on delicate stationary. Never mind that over the years we've kind of grown apart, probably stemming from my lack of enthusiasm for
The Green Album. Never mind that I think he's a card short of a full deck. Never mind that he's decided to marry someone else (some Japanese girl, of course!). Or that I can't forgive him for
Make Believe. Never mind that he's never taken my advice regarding haircuts. Or that I've never really been into
Maladroit. He's still my boyfriend and I'm still that 18 year old girl.
1.
Elliott Smith and “Say Yes”—
"I'm in love with the world through the eyes of a girl/ Who's still around the morning after." Smith is at his best on this song. Simple lyrics: boy meets girl, girl is kind of a flake, dumps him, boy feels like shit, they get back together, rinse, repeat. I can't tell you how wonderful this song is. It may be a cop-out to say that I can't write anything that would do it justice. But that's how it is. It has to be heard. It has to be rewound, and listened to again. In interviews, Smith never quite believed that people liked his work. Or him for that matter. It almost pained him to know that there were people out there who loved everything he did. The tragedy of Smith's death may have been something inevitable, but he left a body of work that will break people's hearts, whether he likes it or not.
Since being plucked from blog obscurity, Kristine has been fulfilling a childhood dream of writing professionally. She credits her late father, Mike, for instilling in her a love for music and mix tapes. When she isn’t creating lists and counting backwards, she works as a production assistant at a news channel and is a grad student at UP. You can read more about her non-life here.
TAGS: sad bastard jeff buckley weezer elliott smith nick drake ryan adams robert smith morrissey
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